Once upon a time, in a land not very far away, when things were getting a bit rough, someone suggested to me that we run away together to Paris.

It was an extremely romantic notion and for a fleeting moment, thoughts of sitting in a café for the rest of my life eating pain au chocolat (aka chocolate croissants) sounded mighty tempting (and delicious).

But I came to the quick realization that I am not the runaway type.  I am more the stand-in-the-middle-of-a-shit-storm-with-an-umbrella type, because moving to Paris or even plain-old avoiding an issue doesn’t make reality go away.  You can run to the end of the earth, but if you don’t face the tough stuff, it will always haunt you.

While it is tempting to run from uncomfortable situations, problems, challenges or  sometimes even opportunities, emotionally or physically taking off will not solve anything.  It just distracts you from your goals and purposes.  And when the going gets tough, those who will persevere are the ones willing to face the storm head on.

So, here I am to offer you a virtual umbrella to use the next time you have to face one of those storms.  Hopefully, you can use it to keep as much residual crap off of you as possible, as you face the situation head on.  And if you need moral support, ask someone you trust to stand under it with you.  Ask nicely, and they may even hold it for you.  It may not be as romantic as running away together to Paris in theory, but the best friends and partners will stand by you during the worst of times.

Every storm passes and those who can weather these storms will find themselves with the strength, experience and confidence to take on anything and succeed.

I hope that many blue skies are ahead of you, but if the storm’s a-coming, just ask- I will be happy to loan you my umbrella.

AKA It’s hard to drive the car by looking in the rear view-mirror

If you have spent any time in business classes or reading mutual fund paperwork, you may have heard that the concept that past performance is not an indicator of future performance.  There are a lot of debates about whether these theories apply to the stock market, but they certainly apply to your life.

I have encountered many entrepreneurs (as well as other professionals) who spend a lot of time talking about the limitations of their past.  They didn’t go to the right school.  Their dad didn’t take enough time to focus their talents.  They did poorly in math.  They don’t have any industry experience.  Their business has always struggled.  They aren’t good at marketing.  Whatever the particular circumstances, in each case, they are using the past as an excuse for their present and future situation.

Well, put this little tidbit in your pipe and smoke it—you can’t drive the car forward by looking in the rearview mirror.

Try this exercise, taught to me by my dear friend and collaborator LeAnne Ozaine-Smith (CEO of Ascend Live).  Hold up a mirror to your face.  Now try to walk forward solely by looking in the mirror at what’s behind you (I highly suggest moving any furniture or obstacles out of your path before you attempt this).  Not so easy, huh?

The reality is that the past is the past.  And while you can take away valuable lessons from the past, the past doesn’t limit your ability to move forward, unless you let it.

You are in total control over your today and tomorrow.  You have the power to make decisions based outside of your past.  You can’t change the past, but you can make it irrelevant- if you make the decision to do so.

Try to avoid the temptation to use the past as a crutch.  If your ego is willing to suck it up, you can start over and make great strides at any time.  Your limitation is not the past, it is only you.

If you want to move forward, don’t navigate by looking behind you.  Look ahead, focus on where you want to go and come up with the best path to get there.

I have been asked more and more often about how entrepreneurs and businesses can stand out in a crowded marketplace, and I keep pointing to what has worked for me- the WTH Factor.

The WTH Factor is simply something that makes people stop and go “What the Heck is that?”  It works because there is so much information, products and services out there, that even strong offerings sometimes don’t get noticed, just because of the noise.

The WTH Factor makes people stop and take notice.  Their initial reaction may not be positive, but if you have the credibility to back up your offering, you have at least gotten over the initial hurdle of getting someone’s attention.

I used this strategy for the cover of my upcoming book, The Entrepreneur Equation (yes, now available for pre-order with amazing bonuses).  Some people loved it and some people (including my publisher’s sales team) initially hated it because I didn’t “look like a business author” and that it didn’t look like a “traditional business book” (my response to that can be read here…).  But what I realized was that that was awesome- because it would make people in the bookstores stop and go “WTH?!”  Then, when they picked it up, read the amazing endorsements, the compelling Foreword by Michael Port and my biography, they would be hooked. But if I didn’t have that WTH Factor- if the book looked like every other cover- they might not even stop to take a closer look.

To make the WTH Factor work, it has to be true to who you are and you have to have credibility behind it, or else it appears obnoxious and gimmicky.  It also needs to be unusual relative to the expectations of the customer.  That doesn’t always mean being over the top, provocative or crazy; it could mean being stoic, quiet or something else entirely- as long as it is unexpected in its context.  This could be an unexpected blog headline, product name, packaging- whatever it is that makes people stop for just a second, which is not an easy feat today.

Don’t worry so much about whether someone likes or dislikes what you are doing; just make sure they won’t ignore it!

There are a couple of truths related to getting help in business: (i) it is very hard it is to ask for help and (ii) we can’t build our businesses (or our lives) alone. So once you are ready, how do you get the help that you need? Here are three quick steps to getting others to help you (I know, that sounds like an infomercial, but it is really this easy- no Ginzu knives included):
1- Ask, or at Least Have an Answer
If nobody knows what you need, it is pretty hard for them to help you. If you need help, the onus is on you. We have personal, professional, alumni, social and other networks, so use them! Most people are very willing to offer help if they know what the heck you need. How many times have you been in a conversation when someone said, “How can I help you?” and the other party said, “I don’t know?”Know what help you need and be both willing and able to articulate it.

2- Make it Easy
Once you are ready and willing to ask, make it as easy as possible for others to help. Focus on one thing- not five. For example, if you are seeking referrals and have multiple services, only ask for referrals on one service per referring source. People have really short attention spans and if there is too much information or too many choices, the chances are that you will get nothing in return. For referrals, you can choose to focus all of your referrals on your highest margin service or perhaps have different referral sources referring different services, based on which service is most complementary to their business- but each source should just have one call to action.
Also, give specifics. Instead of saying you need “a lawyer”, let your networks know that you are looking to spend $X on a patent attorney that specializes in process patents related to software. The more specific you are, the better your chances are of getting back what you need.
And make sure to remove obstacles. Don’t make the helpers click through links, have to interpret information, or jump through other hoops. Make the route to help as direct as possible and if there are instructions needed, give step by step guidance so that your helper has to do the least amount possible.

3- Be Grateful (Not Greedy)
Last but not least, use your head. Make your “ask” appropriate to the relationship (i.e. don’t ask someone you met an hour ago to lend you their vacation home). Also, pick your battles. People are happy to help, but if you ask constantly, their helpfulness may wane. Make sure you are asking when you really need the help- not just when you are being lazy (hint: if all they have to do is a Google search to help you, then you are being lazy).

And finally, thank them. Help is a privilege, not a right, so acknowledge when someone has gone out of their way, and return the favor or pay it forward when you are able to.

A good part of our lives are spent seeking out comforts.  The familiar plays on a misguided notion of safety.  The devil you know is better than the devil that you don’t know, right?

Not necessarily.  When you are too comfortable, it means you are probably not trying hard enough.  You have gotten to the point where you are “good enough”.  But good enough is not great, outstanding or groundbreaking.  Good enough walks on a treadmill, instead of blazing a new path.  Good enough doesn’t encourage progress. Good enough doesn’t change the world.

When you are uncomfortable, you are pushing boundaries.  You are trying new things.  You are willing to fail and fail big.  This is where amazing personal and professional shifts come from.

• In your workouts, being physically uncomfortable is where you gain increased strength, speed and agility;
• In your relationships, being vulnerable and uncomfortable is where you create true bonds with others;
• In your career or business, taking uncomfortable risks or doing work outside of your “comfort zone” is where you can advance yourself to the next level.

Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Comfort equals accepting the status quo.  If you don’t aspire to anything more, then go ahead and be comfortable. Uncomfortable leads to growth.  It’s scary and may be painful, but pain is temporary.  Your achievements are forever.

By Carol Roth
46 Insights On Partnering And Collaborating In Business
Forget building or buying – when partnering is the way to go, heed these “do’s”
When looking to grow your business, the choices come down to build, buy or partner. I decided to focus first on partnering and asked like-minded entrepreneurs and advisors for the straight talk on how to approach partnerships and collaboration for maximum benefit.
Here is what you need to know and need to do when approaching partnering in your business:

1. It’s Really Simple
Make sure you find someone with complementary skills. If you are a programmer, find a business guy, and vice versa. Don’t find just another “copy” of who you are.
Thanks to: Bob Cavezza of isWearing.

2. Values Matter!
Start with a small project that has limited risk as a way to test your values alignment with your new/prospective partner. People underestimate the power and influence of our values on decision-making and how we approach and perform our work. When values are out of sync – disaster ensues!
Thanks to: Kendra Coleman of Kindred Organizational Consulting.

3. Help Me, Help You.
Partnerships are great for entrepreneurs BUT make sure both sides help each other and get something out of it and it’s not one sided. Everyone is looking to get ahead so when partnerships form don’t be surprised if someone leaves you hanging. Make sure when you talk about partnering that each of you put on the table what you will do for each other. Partnerships can be a great thing but make sure you approach it as a “Help me, Help You,” situation and you’re golden.
Thanks to: Ashley Bodi of BusinessBeware.Biz.

4. Define Ground Rules Upfront
It’s easy to say “oh yeah I know that”, but most small business collaborations don’t – make sure the ground rules of the partnership are firmly established upfront including financial terms. Make it clear the value each party is bringing, so if you are both delivering a solution to potential clients, you collectively can pour your collective energy into making the collaboration work for the benefit of the client and not second guessing the motivations of your partners.
Thanks to: Naomi Moneypenny of ManyWorlds, Inc.

5. Winning Partnerships
The best partner matches require the two people involved to have the same beliefs about money management. Much like a marriage, two people with differing values when it comes to how money is spent will destroy a relationship. So, make sure your prospective partner feels the same way about how to manage money.
Thanks to: Michelle Gamble-Risley of 3L Publishing.

6. Aim High!
Oprah Winfrey said, “Surround yourself only with those who lift you higher.” That said, attend events to connect deeply with like-minded professionals with complimentary expertise. Explore win-win-win ways to work together. Action Plan Marketing Guru Robert Middleton organized an Info Guru Summit weekend in January of 2010. That event brought my “Bio Whisperer” expertise to a well targeted group that has introduced me to 1000′s of new ezine subscribers, blog followers, and customers.
Thanks to: Nancy Juetten of Main Street Media Savvy.

7. Best Must Do Business Strategy
Do business with someone you can drink with. I learned this from the Koreans. When you can drink with someone, the real person comes out. The face of business comes off. You get to know if those “trust me” requests (that usually go along with a pile of one sided legal contracts) are really valid. Unfair to those that don’t drink? Nah. I’m on a 1 month hiatus and I’m still cutting deals. Sure some people don’t drink, and I respect that, no rule is absolute.
Thanks to: Mike Faith of Headsets.com.

8. Trust Is The Key
Trust is the key to all relationships. If you want to build profitable partnerships, work with people you trust. Effective collaborative relationships are built on trust. Go first, demonstrate your trust in the person with whom you are thinking about partnering. Be willing to share your thoughts and ideas. Gain the trust of others by trusting others.
Thanks to: Bud Bilanich of Bud Bilanich, The Common Sense Guy.

9. Map Your Client Ecosystem
A great collaboration strategy is to find referral partners who hunt at the same watering hole, but who play at different stages in the value chain. For example, our target clients are technology startups. One of the first things they do is go to a lawyer to incorporate. Next, they want to launch and raise money, so we are brought in, and then we refer them on to recruiters as they grow. In short, understand the value chain of your market and partner with those sitting in front and behind you.
Thanks to: Nathan Beckord of VentureArchetypes LLC.

10. Partnering To Stay On Track
I consult with start-ups & launchers on their PR strategies & do a lot of business coaching, too. As a solopreneur, I have different clients pulling me in different directions – it’s hard to stay on track. So I hooked up with an accountability partner. We work together at least once a week; this keeps us on track & focused on long & short-term projects.

So that is my “must do” strategy – find an accountability partner, meet regularly & see what a big difference it makes in your business!
Thanks to: Lizzy Shaw of Lizzy Shaw Public Relations.

11. Be Specific
When entering into in a partnership of any kind, it is important to be specific about each person’s role. Whether you are partnering or collaborating – be sure you spell out each person’s obligation to the other, what you will get, and what the benefits are for each party. If partnering in a corp, be sure you have a shareholder agreement that specifies duties and roles, and consider having shares vest over time for each party. If only collaborating, be specific as to what each person gets.
Thanks to: Sarah Shaw of Entreprenette.

12. Swim With Bigger Fish
When considering partnering or collaborating, many business owners think they want somebody just like them.

Nice and safe, right? Maybe.

Considering that the point of collaboration is for growth then you would want to consider partnering with someone who challenges and encourages you to get out of your comfort zone. Staying in a place of comfort will keep you where you are. Working alongside someone who pushes you (in all the right ways) can bring growth.
Thanks to: Karen Graves of Vision Launch.

13. Partnership Is Like Marriage
Partnership is like marriage. Like marriage, sometimes you give more than you get and sometimes you get more than you give. A partnership is something that you work on constantly.
Thanks to: “Jolly” John Pulsifer of Jolly John Auto City.

14. Open The Communication Lines
Always keep the lines of communication open. This means to always ask questions and clarify with your business partner, making sure that both partners are on the same page. Lack of honest communication is the biggest downfall of partnerships. Example questions to ask your partner include; What can we do to help each other be more successful? What should we keep doing? What should we do more of, or less of?
Thanks to: Alan Vengel of Vengel Consulting Group.

15. What’s In It For Me?
Businesses seeking partners are often clear on what they’re looking for from that partner, for their own business. However, for a successful partnership that will go beyond the immediate deal, you need to think about the motivations for the partner. The ability to clearly articulate not only what’s in it for you, but also what’s in it for them, is key to success.
Thanks to: Sam Liu of Partnerpedia.

16. Partner Rather Than Compete!
A full 50% of our business comes to us through partners. Since we are 100% an internet business, the name of the game is search engine optimization (SEO). My partners are good at it, and as affiliate sites they get paid a commission only when a sale is made. It’s like I’m piggybacking on their SEO. Sure I have to share their visibility with other merchants they select on their site, but the results prove out. I pay 15% of a sale which averages $10 per customer, very reasonable for us.
Thanks to: Jeff Block of JustPaperRoses.com.

17. Give More Than You Take
Find a way to give rather than look for what to get in all of your dealings and interactions. It may seem like a paradox and somewhat of a cliché, but it does seem to be true that the more you give the more you receive. The only way to see if this is really true for yourself is to put it into practice consistently and with sincerity and see what happens. Don’t wait until you are successful to start giving back. Giving is not an afterthought to success, it is the foundation.
Thanks to: Jeffrey Gitterman of Beyond Success Consulting.

18. Key To Successful Partnering
The key to a successful partnering relationship is to make sure that the goals and expectations of both parties are aligned. The worst scenario is where one partner is expecting leads to be passed to them, and the other partner is anticipating sales to the other partner’s existing customer base.
Thanks to: Tom Salzer of Quartermain, Inc.

19. Build Power Partners & Grow
Find your perfect power partners and create formal referral agreements. For example, a professional organizer will build a book of business more quickly if she aligns with a Realtor, moving company, junk hauler and cleaning company. Turn them in to Power Partners. Grow and rise together. All four companies can host workshops together, market together and become each other’s sales force. Give each other 10% of the net sales or a flat fee for each referral that turns in to a paying client.
Thanks to: Angela Cody-Rouget of Major Mom.

20. Keep Communication Flowing
If you want to grow and enhance your business with partners and collaborators, it is critical to keep the lines of communication open. Make sure they know what you do, and are updated about your company’s developments. Don’t assume they know all areas of your expertise — instead “market” to them as you would to any prospect. Be sure you also communicate as you work together — no partner has ever complained about over-communicating, but many have been frustrated by the lack of it!
Thanks to: Beverly Flaxington of The Collaborative.

21. Put It In Writing!
Establish an agreement in writing that clearly defines the roles, responsibilities, financial terms, schedule and anything else that is part of the partnership. If the arrangement is between friends or among family members it is still vital (maybe even more so) to put it in writing. Having a defined agreement is more efficient, insures a successful project and protects partnerships, friendships or family harmony.
Thanks to: Janet Christy of Leverage & Development, LLC.

22. Communicate To Collaborate
The one ‘must-do’ thing we do in successful collaborations is to have weekly meetings that can be canceled only if both sides agree. If either organization won’t commit to a weekly management meeting, odds are that the collaboration won’t be successful because there’s no clear communication channel for the collaborators.
Thanks to: Shenlei Winkler of Fashion Research Institute.

23. You’re Getting Into Bed
Do your homework on a perspective partner upfront to determine if they are looking for a relationship that benefits both of you, or if they’re drowning, and flailing to grab onto anyone that will keep them from going under. Also, check in with your “gut reaction”. If they pass the tests, then trust completely.
Thanks to: William Milnazik of AXIS visual.

24. Be An Idea Expert!
Always have specific ideas and suggestions ready BEFORE you meet with the person with whom you want to collaborate. You will find that the ideas that come from your area of expertise are the reason why they should want to collaborate with you too. Present those ideas as a starting point. At the very least, he/she should appreciate that you have taken time to consider the options. At best, your ideas will be used as is or they may be the beginning of a strong collaboration concept.
Thanks to: Jessica Cohen of BucksMontMom.com.

25. Strengths & Weaknesses
When you partner with someone combine your strengths and their weaknesses or your weaknesses and their strengths to create the best synergy possible.
Thanks to: Julie Austin of HydroSport.

26. Collaboration: Free & Fruitful
Small business owners usually have limited resources (time, people, and money). An often untapped / under-used resource is their own suppliers. Suppliers often have experts, designers, drafters, engineers, and creative-types on staff who would be pleased to provide assistance in product development, advertising campaigns, marketing concepts, etc. Often you receive these services free of charge. My suppliers understand that this is “the cost of entry” for doing business with companies I run.
Thanks to: Mitch Pisik of Breckwell Products.

27. Goals And Champions
Successful strategic partnerships require two key ingredients for success: (i) distinct, well-thought out goals, and (ii) internal champions. The goals should be the result of serious and honest discussions between the partners regarding expectations, and should be translated into something measurable. Track your progress as you proceed. Also, each partner should identify by name an internal champion that has the necessary power and influence to move the relationship along successfully.
Thanks to: Christopher McDemus of VC Deal Lawyer.

28. Deep Industry Understanding
My one tip would be to find a partner who actually understands your business, not just on the surface but truly understands the business as much as you do. In essence you need somebody who can not only fill in the gap of specific market knowledge yet also understands what your company is capable of providing to each client.
Thanks to: Marc Anderson of TalktoCanada.com.

29. To Collaborate Or Not?
When deciding if it makes sense to collaborate, you must answer in the affirmative to this question: Is it beneficial to ALL parties?

When you do decide to collaborate you must give more than what you expect.

Does this sound crazy? No, when you are busy tracking who gave what, you lose the essence of collaboration which is to develop relationships and provide service beyond measure. An unmatched benefit of success.
Thanks to: Yvonne Rivers of The Phoebe Group.

30. Honesty Is The Best Policy
Have complete transparency in term of operations, remuneration and most importantly objectives. A crack in the relationship at an early stage or the revelation of a lie at a later date will not only destroy the immediate efficacy of the partnership but also create negative reverberations and possibly bad word of mouth that will damage the credibility and reputation of your business.
Thanks to: Daniel Callaghan of MBA & Company.com.

31. High Trust = True Synergy
In a high-trust relationship, speed goes up and costs go down. Demonstrate a propensity to trust by extending trust abundantly to those who have earned your trust, and conditionally to those who are earning your trust. Learn how to appropriately extend trust to others based on the situation, risk, and credibility of the people involved, and most importantly, keep commitments at all costs. Say what you’re going to do, then do what you promised.
Thanks to: Stephen M.R. Covey of Global Speed Of Trust Practice.

32. Clarity When Collaborating
Be very clear about what you need from the collaboration and always be open to allowing the space to be filled with someone who we can help fulfill their dreams while jointly owning a space within your organization.
Move away from old business models of competition and comparisons and develop relationships that are structured around compensation being commensurate with contribution.

Thanks to: Heidi Reagan of Wake Up Women Be.

33. The Right Partners Add Value
Be complementary. Partners who offer services/products that truly complement yours–and your brand promise–are the ones that make the most sense. Ask yourself of each potential partnership: how would this company add value for my customers?
Thanks to: Kristin Warner of FirePath Communications.

34. Throw Give/Take Out The Door!
It’s not about you. It’s not even about give/take. I’m a firm believer that it’s give/give. Give until you can’t give anymore. In the long run, the benefit is tenfold.

I have a relationship with a chocolate and coffee company. Last year, I traded services for her product, which became my holiday client gifts. Not only did she benefit from my services, but she also received exposure to potential clients. She benefited more initially but I consider the relationship a valuable one.
Thanks to: Meghan Ely of OFD Consulting LLC.

35. Partnering: It’s Not About You
As companies, we partner because there is value in it for us. But remember that the partner has to feel the same way too.

If we are strategic in what we are trying to achieve, the relationship has to be meaningful and fulfilling for both partners. Your partner must want you as much as you need them.

As a small business I have often less resources to offer than other potential partners. I just remember that what makes me unique for a client also makes me valuable in a partnership.
Thanks to: Phil Ayres of Consected LLC.

36. Pretend To Be Worst Enemies
An attorney and an accountant once gave this advice to me: “Pretend you and your business partner are worst enemies for a day. It will be hard to do, because you like each other now. But you need to think through various scenarios—like death, disability and financial disputes—as if you were adversaries. What processes and agreements do you want to put in place to protect yourself and your business?” Write down your roles, financial agreements and decision-making/communication ground rules.
Thanks to: Leigh Steere of Managing People Better, LLC.

37. Give To Get
Be willing to give more than you are expected to give. I have learned that when you freely share your expertise and allow yourself to have the heart of a giver, you will receive more than your share of help in return. The law of reciprocity definitely applies to your relationships with those who can advance your business more than you can do alone.
Thanks to: Dallon Christensen of FirstStep Concepts.

38. A Simple Age Old Method
Just email the person you want to partner with and pitch your proposal that very clearly states the benefit you have to offer that person. If it’s going to benefit him, he’ll get back. Most high profile people who understand marketing and PR get back with either a yes or a no. Even best selling author Seth Godin has replied to my email. It’s the old method but it’s very simple, it works. Try it!
Thanks to: Vinil Ramdev of StartUpGrowthExpert.com.

39. Must Do Tip
Communication. Solo entrepreneurs that partner and start a business with other entrepreneurs need to share and be transparent about all information. While solo entrepreneurs are used to running a business on their own, they aren’t used to relaying their mind share with other decision makers. If people on the team are designated as account managers they’ll have access to a lot of information and it’s critical they have the ability to concisely take back and communicate that data to their team.
Thanks to: Lisa Loeffler of LightBox PR.

40. Partnership Prenuptial
Like any other partnership, situations change and can affect the relationship.

No matter how short-term or informal, terms and “what ifs” should be discussed upfront and documented. While you may feel you don’t need a formal, written agreement, an informal e-mail, simply to confirm your understanding, can be invaluable.

Ideally, talk to an attorney about critical terms, make them “user-friendly”, and create a template you can edit to use as a “confirming we’re on the same page” e-mail.
Thanks to: Stacy Robin of The Degania Group.

41. Rules, Rules And More
My one “must do” tip when collaborating and/or partnering with others in business is to have a document that includes a firm set of rules and guidelines that are agreed upon and signed by all parties. This will set a clear path for an ongoing relationship. The document can also be updated when needed, but it is something that is imperative in order to protect all parties.
Thanks to: Laney Liner of Blue Thunder Creative Group, Inc..

42. Character Counts
The one “must do” tip to collaborate or partner is to understand the motivation of the other partner, and the value system or code of ethics under which they operate. Even when your partner offers the best of abilities which complement yours, know what their motivation is, where they are headed, and how they will respond when the unexpected happens. Understanding these issues will create an atmosphere of trust, and allow room for working through the challenges which inevitably arise.
Thanks to: Robert Scanlan of Robert Scanlan, Transitions Coach.

43. It Ain’t What Or Who You Know
People say, “It’s not WHAT you know that’s important, it’s WHO you know”. The truth is, if you don’t know how to persuade or motivate people, then I don’t care if you know Bill Gates. Being able to persuade others without being a manipulative sleaze ball is the #1 difference-maker.

Mastering persuasion will improve your selling, negotiating, project management, marketing, and writing. Your job is to MASTER the science of persuasion. (Yes it is a science.)
Thanks to: Tim David of The Compel Model.

44. Think Long Term
The single most important thing in building strong partnering and collaborating relationships with industry vendors is ensuring that the relationship benefits both parties. This requires trust, effort and an eye toward the future: building a long-term relationship. Try to see the relationship from their side and what you can do to make it work for them. Do that and they will make every effort to make it work for you, or they simply aren’t going to be a good partner.
Thanks to: Scott Harris of Mustang Marketing.

45. Only A Few Matter
Most companies seem determined to engage in as many partnerships as possible. The reality is that only a small number matter. My tip is to figure out which partnerships provide the highest value and then focus only on them. In other words, identify what is most powerful and compelling about the combination of companies then give the partnership the best chance of success by 1) assigning joint executive sponsors, 2) naming dedicated teams, and 3) building a joint go-to-market program.
Thanks to: Thomas Butta of 21Weeks, LLC.

46. Explore Your Inner Publisher!
You’ll attract more promising collaborative opportunities if you own locations where your unique content is published and updated daily. People like to collaborate with people who can spread the word about the collaboration. If all you have is a website and maybe a Facebook page, the value you add to a collaborative process is limited. If you own branded media outlets that you use to share ideas and showcase your expertise, you are a more attractive potential collaborative partner!
Thanks to: Donna Maria Coles Johnson of Founder/CEO, Indie Business Media.

I think that this list presents a very good foundation for thinking about partnerships. If you have additional insights to share, please do so in the comments section!

A Negotiating Lesson From My Dad

Once again proving that street smarts is often more handy than book smarts… 

My dad can’t spell banana (literally, he spells it “banna”), but he can negotiate a mean deal.  Sometimes this is by annoying the hell out of the other party, but in this story, it was something different…

In the early 1990s, when my parents got divorced, my father had to sell our house.  Because the lawyers ended up with a good chunk of what was a fairly small asset pool to begin with, that meant downsizing. So, my father had the task of selling off some furniture.

One of the pieces was this “lovely” wall unit from that fine French furniture company “The House of Tackee’” from the late 1960s or early 1970s, complete with orange drapery behind wrought iron and wood, smoked mirror accents, a built in turntable/sound system and a flip-on fireplace (you can discuss the merits of this piece in the comments section…I know, I have no idea how this was ever considered hot or trendy) .

As you can imagine, there wasn’t a lot of demand for this type of furniture, so my dad had to be resourceful.  When he was at the local bagel shop one Saturday morning, the lady behind the counter mentioned she was looking for some furniture and so my dad asked if she wanted to come over to view the wall unit.

Apparently she had been smoking crack, because when she came to view it, she liked it.  She looked it up, down and all around and finally asked my dad what he wanted for it.

My dad said, “Why don’t you make me an offer?”

She paused and after several seconds held up two fingers.

“Two hundred dollars?” my dad thought to himself.  He knew he probably would have a hard time finding anyone else, so he said, “Well, it was less than I wanted, but if you throw in some bagels for a few months, it’s a deal”.

She agreed, handed him a wad of cash and said that she couldn’t pay for it all at once, but that she would pay it off in installments within a few weeks. My father was confused and counted the cash.  She had given him $500.

After another few seconds, it occurred to him that when she held up the two fingers, she had meant two THOUSAND dollars, not two hundred.  He put the $500 in his pocket and said, “No problem, you can pay the rest in installments.”

He actually got $2000 for something he should have paid someone else to haul away.  So, how did he do that?

-He had the other woman make the offer first.  This way, he didn’t place any limit on it.  He only wanted about $400, but by letting her go first, he didn’t cap out the upside.

-He wasn’t greedy.  As the saying goes, pigs get fat and hogs get slaughtered.  If he held out, he may not have found anyone to take the darn thing.  In this case, by not being greedy, he got more than he ever dreamed of.

-He also kept his cool until he understood the circumstances.  When she handed him the cash, he could have blurted out, “But I was talking about $200”.  By taking the time to process what she was thinking (which was obviously different than he initially thought) he ended up with a deal that they were both very happy with.

-Oh, and he got her to throw in some bagels, which was something that was easy for her to do, but still added value to him.

So, thanks to Bernie for this great lesson.  I will share in the future another time that I used the same strategy with much success.

And as a side note, when he was selling his king size bed, the first guy that came to the house looked at the bed and said, “How many people can this sleep”? 

My dad said, “How many people do you want it to sleep?” [notice a pattern here?]

The guy said, “Eight”. 

My dad sized up the bed and said, “It seems like it can fit eight…”.

When you don’t value what you have to offer, nobody else will either.

I spend a lot of time asking entrepreneurs, especially women, if they have “slutty” tendencies.  I think many of us have been there at one point in our business (or perhaps even personal) lives.  That’s why I want to make sure you are not being what I call a “business slut”.  Being a business slut is giving your time, money, effort, services, etc. away- over and over again- for free or at a significant amount less that it’s worth because you don’t value yourself and what you bring to the table.

How many times have you discounted what you do and offered to provide something that you should be paid for totally for free?   As I speak to entrepreneurs around the country, I hear this as a problem over and over again.

Now, I am not talking about helping out a friend, colleague or even stranger from time to time (in a business sense, of course- get your mind out of the gutter!).  I advocate being generous, but there is a difference between generosity and slut-hood.  I am talking about not knowing where to draw the line.  I am talking about discounting your services because of a lack of confidence and purpose.  Those are the hallmarks of a true business slut.  Baskin-Robbins doesn’t give away a free scoop of ice cream (or a freakin’ hot fudge sundae) even after the free pink spoonful taste and neither should you. 

Sluts make life hard on everyone because they set a dangerous precedent.  If you have a feeling of self-worth (and you should, my god your time is valuable!) you can make sure to explain the value of your goods and services to someone else, friend or stranger.  It all starts with you- your confidence in the value of your time and your business will translate into others respecting what you have to offer.